Love & Life

Table for ONE please 

  
Being a single woman means that you have some form of tolerance being on your own and enjoying your own company. Out of all my friends I am now the only single one left which really has become apparent to me in the last 2 months. The dynamics of friendships have changed/ altered and although I am used to living the single lifestyle, calling up girlfriends to accompany me for drinks or a meal is not as easy as it used to be. Yesterday I was tired and hungry and all I craved for was prawn linguine so instead of fighting my cravings and staying wrapped up in bed hungry and miserable, I decided to doll myself up and cater to my own needs. Dinning alone can’t be that bad can it? Well yesterday I decided to shake off the fear of eating alone in public and go for it. 

Entering the restaurant wasn’t a problem, I was greeted with smiles and warm hellos but as soon as the words “table for one” exited out of my mouth the sympathetic looks from the female hostess immediately made me realise Shit, I’m really about to sit in this intimate Italian restaurant and eat alone. I encountered a few stares from females dining with their other halves and smiles from men dining with friends but my overall experience was… Pleasant. Surprisingly I enjoyed my meal, I enjoyed having time to myself, time to think and reflect on things. Will I do it again? Most likely. Why should I just sit at home alone missing out on things I want. This is not necessarily how I planned or want my life to be, but I’m used to catering to my own needs so taking myself out alone should not be an issue…. I guess 

New Lipglam Alert!

  
Ive been looking for a matte lipstick for a while now as previous ones I have tried often crumbles on my lips after an hour or so. After browsing on Instagram one product that keeps appearing on my timeline is NYX cosmetics. They have a great following on Instagram and I’ve seen quite a few socialites promote their  product. They have an amazing variety of shades/ products not just for your lips but for every part of your gorgeous face! They also promote no animal testing which is great. NYX cosmetics is an American company and they unfortunately do not offer direct worldwide delivery ( I tried to buy a stack of things but it was way too complicated to get delivered) I did however discover that in the UK Selfridges, Boots, The Beauty Store, Asos and Very hold some of NYX cosmetics.

I have so far purchased NYX liquid suede cream lipstick and Lip lingerie which are amazing! It has a smooth matte finish and lasts at a good time length. I also purchased their Mirco brow pencil which is perfect to create the right tint for your face without being overpowering. 

I will definitely be purchasing some new products in the near future! 

Don’t worry about what I’m doing! 

  

It’s so astonishing to me the way people find it a priority to know the ins and outs of other people’s lives but are not willing to share anything of theirs. Why is that ok? Who gave you superiority privilege to be all up in my business wanting to know what I’m doing, where I’m going and who I’m seeing but yet I barely know anything that goes on in your life. Maybe I’m just wired up differently but the way I see it, I am a grown ass woman and although I have girlfriends I am close with, I believe I am grown enough to not have to share every aspect of my life. The reason why I don’t know every aspect of people’s lives is because it is none of my damn business. If you don’t share your business with me, I don’t ask questions because clearly it is something I don’t need to know. It’s not my place to know. I am not your mother therefore you’re grown enough to do as you please and share information as you see fit. That’s the way I see it. As a little girl you share every aspect of your life with your friends but when you’re an adult it’s not necessary. Not everyone is wishing you well, people have hidden agendas and I’m all for having positive energy surrounding me. It is not fair to do as you please with whoever, not share information but then you integrate your friends for their business. It does not work like that. Not for me anyway. If I want to share my business with a friend about my life, only then I will do so. 

The Young Ones Are The Brave Ones 

  
 They’re most definitely are! Lately, everyday I’ve been getting approached by younger guys and I’m not talking by 1-2 years I’m talking about a good 6-7 years younger than I am. As humbling and flattering it is for the recognition of my beauty, at 27 years old I just can’t see past hello when 20 year olds are talking to me. This is no shade to their character or potential capabilities of being a great boyfriend but at the youngish age of 27 I can’t expect a 20 year old to fulfil my requirements on what I expect my man to be. I mean why should they!?! At 20 years old the last thing on my mind was having babies and marriage. I was happy being young and free, enjoying life with friends and studying at university. It just wouldn’t work, it would be selfish of myself to expect a 20 year old to settle down. 

Everyday I’m getting reached out by younger guys thinking that I am the same age as them. Once I have confirmed my actual age, they’ve actually given me a full blown personal statement on why I should give them my number, and why age ain’t nothing but a number. But at this age unfortunately it is more than just a number. It’s about vision, life goals, wants, desires and experience. At 20/21 you’re just stepping into the full legal world of adulthood, I wouldn’t want to strip away the “getting to know who I am” stage from anyone especially from a boy learning and growing to be a man.
But saying all of this I have to give credit where it’s due. These younger guys have balls of steel for seeing what they want and going for it. They have so much charm, humour and charisma… More than I can say for the men my age group and above. 

Where are they!?! Like seriously, I haven’t been approached by a man my age or older in so long. Are they all taken? Or are they just focused on building their professional life that they have no time to worry about women? I am all for the last point mentioned, building and working hard for a brighter future but damn! Can a girl get someone in her age group!? Lol
I just don’t want to invest my time in someone younger, and be left disappointed because they have come to realise they’re not ready for the level of commitment I require. 
Time is of the essence, at this age I know what I want so settling for company and sex is just not an option for me.

Pushing Positivity 

So about two weeks ago my friend posted that he was participating in an event for a great charity. After checking what the event was about I immediately wanted to be a part of such a great cause! So on November 12th not just myself but my lovely team members above (called the GameChangers) will be taking part in the sleep out event for Centrepoint charity.

This means we will be spending the night on the street from 7pm-7am experiencing what thousands of homeless young people experience every night.

If you’re wondering why? There are young people running away from home for many reasons. Some are experiencing different types of abuse within their household, some are being kicked out by their troubled parents who have drug addictions, escaping street crime, mental health issues etc so the only option for them is to run away to escape but sadly they’re ending up on the streets.

CentrePoint homeless charity has a much broader approach to tackling youth homelessness. They look at the root causes of homelessness and ensure that everything they do makes a real and lasting difference to young people – whether that’s helping them to find a home, supporting them into education, teaching them basic life skills or ensuring they have the opportunity to find work.

Ive been wanting to give back to those less fortunate than myself for sometime. I know I have complained about some issues I face in my life, but understand that I am fully aware how blessed I am to have supportive family, friends and a roof over my head! Many are not as fortunate to have things we take for granted everyday!

I will be documenting my experience on the 12th of November but before that day arrives I need to raise a minimum of £350. It would be so amazing if you can please help by sponsoring myself and my team to raise money to get these young people off the streets and get the help they need via CentrePoint. Please share/ spread the word! ✌🏾️ All donations are gratefully received no matter how big or small

Sponsor Link:

sleepout2015londonotb.everydayhero.com/uk/jade
Thank you so much! Much Love 😘😘

❤️💛💚

Does Being A Good Woman Hold You Back?


I saw this meme on Instagram the other day and as funny as it was at first glance, I couldn’t help feeling like I could relate to it . If you have read my previous post about the type of woman I pride myself to be, you would understand why at 27 I would be feeling some type of way. There’s so many things I can discuss in relation to why good girls get left behind but the overall  feeling I have is that being a good girl has got me no where. Keeping my legs closed, staying focus on what I want seems to not work in my favour. Don’t get me twisted I’m not a Virgin Mary waiting for my knight and shining armour but overall I feel My generation is messed up. We are a new generation where we aim higher than belonging to someone. We have aspirations to be successful in our own right first. Whether it’s to be an Insta famous celeb/ groupie or we have gone to university to better ourselves to get a career of our dreams. I feel that within my generation in particular people no longer NEED each other. It’s more whether we WANT that particular person to partake in our lives. Everyone is so independent and can look after themselves in every way, financially and domestically. It’s not like how it was when our grandparents were young where women needed a man to provide for them, bring home the bacon and a man needed a woman to cook and clean etc. In 2015 the average man is not only financially independent but also he can come home, iron his shirt for work the next morning and cook and clean. Don’t get me started on the boss ladies out there killing the game with their CEO status, finally surpassing men financially. It’s an accomplishment and progression I am 100% proud of, but what happens to when a good woman comes home from work and needs her mind, body and spirit taken care of? Not just looking at myself but also women in my circle/ surroundings who are good women with morals and standards, why are they still single? It’s becoming far too frequent that women with substance are being left on the sideline and these “Insta famous” girls who are known for dipping in and out of relationships repetitively are being claimed and treated like royalty. I had a conversation with a man today about this meme who shared his views. He told me the problem with good girls are men are scared to mess them around so they lose interest once they have figured out what type of woman she is. What I find hard to digest is  if this bullshit excuse is true, surely this would be one of the fundamental reasons to have this kind of woman in a mans live. A good girl with morals is an investment, a “bad bitch” is an expense. The guy went on to tell me that if a good girl was a bit naughty she might catch the eye of a good guy that wants to hold on to her. This is where I started to roll my eyes. What do you mean a bit naughty? If you’re talking about sex I’m going to keep it very real and say every woman loves it. Everyone has a freaky side but it just takes the right partner to bring that side out of you. Who’s to say a good woman with morals can’t and won’t be a freak in the bedroom? But in order for that side to be exposed, I feel you have to lay some foundation and get to know the person on a deeper level. Make her feel like she is the only one you want and think of. I know when it comes to myself I like to get to know a man, have conversations and get a feel of where his mind is at. At the end of the day both parties want sex but mental stimulation is a must. I know it is for me anyway. I’m not saying this would take 90 days like Steve Harvey “think like a man” had suggested, I’m just saying consistency and effort goes a long way. Shit if the vibe and attraction is mutual who’s to say intimacy wouldn’t come within a short time frame. It’s just a sad situation that pussy is a dime a dozen and investing time whether it is small or long Is something that is looked at as  energy draining.

The men who are “wifin” the hoes, the women that lack of substance don’t seem to require depth and mental stimulation from their partner. Instead I find men are focusing on the exterior side of how sexy she looks in her Instagram posts and how many men are envious of the fact she is now claimed. Eventually when the relationship starts to fall a part, the notion of what woman should stand for remains clouded and the bullshit just continues in this  vicious cycle. But hey this is just my opinion.

Ask, Believe and Receive 

I hate talking about my problems to people hence why I keep shit bottled in. I tend to only speak to myself and then end up completely overthinking and mind fucking myself.  I’ve  been trying to have a positive outlook on life. Everyday I give myself a pep talk of “the glass is half full” “everything happens for a reason” but life always has a way of trying me.

I’ve researched, stuck encouraging post-it notes on my mirrors, printed articles, bought books. Shit, I’ve even downloaded ‘The Law of Attraction’ and ‘The Secret Daily Teachings’ app to find words of encouragement. Most recently I’ve downloaded Joel Osteen ‘Word of Today’ app to uplift and motivate me with words of worship to God. I have done all of these things and my morale and my life doesn’t seem to be pushing forward positively.

The law of attraction is basically a state of mind philosophy, for one to free their mind from negativity and revel in the universal law of positive attraction. It’s all about having a positive mind set, think positive thoughts and those very thoughts will become a reality.

But my question is does this shit even work?!

If I keep speaking things into existence and having positive uplifting thoughts will I get what I want?

I’ve been ASKING for what I want, I BELIEVE I deserve and can obtain what I want so when will I RECEIVE what I want??

I need some guidance or a sign because right now I’m feeling so damn fed up and I hate being such a Debbie downer….church on Sunday perhaps? Xo

The Misconception of a Woman’s Body

This also applies to women too. It’s so easy to get caught up in the social world.  The misconception of what a “real” woman should look like has many women feeling inadequate, less than because it’s what’s idolised by the masses. Small waist and a big fat booty is what most are killing themselves to look like, even though every woman’s body is built differently. I am guilty of having this cloudy idea of how I should look. But I understand that no one is perfect, no such thing! I’m flawed and have many imperfections but I’m working on being a better healthier me. To love yourself for exactly who you are and all the qualities you possess is sexy. A man that can’t do the same is NOT for you. 😘😉

No Love Lost

Growing up and witnessing the unhealthy relationship between my parents, I knew that the type of man I would need for myself would have to be the complete opposite to who my dad was and still is. The type of relationship I dreamed of was the opposite of what I witness as a child. It is sad to say but growing up every one of my friends, cousins etc lived in a single parent household but there was one difference between them and myself…the love received from a dad. Although the relationship between these parents did not work out, one thing was for sure their dad still remained a positive active role in their lives. My dad was absent from the time I was 11. Growing up the love I yearned from my dad was never sent my way. I never experience what it felt like to be truly loved by a man. So I said to myself when I get older the man I have in my life will love and adore me. Will love me for all that I am, flaws and all. Unfortunately that idea has not been a reality as of yet. I have always been an old soul, wanted all the traditional things when it comes to a relationship. I wanted a man to want date me, for us to be best of friends, love each other and both of our families. I wanted the love to blossom and eventually lead onto engagement and marriage. For all these points I’ve mentioned they were mainly the reason why I was a late bloomer. I didn’t have my first kiss till I was 18 < late I know and as for the losing virginity part that was a good few years later. Time is pressing on and guys have come and gone and I’m still yet to find ‘the one’

I am yet to find someone who is serious about me as I am about them. One thing for sure the mutual feelings we have for one another has to be number one over everything. I want to feel the passion and desire, to have mutual life goals and aspirations. I am at the stage now where if I cant see the potential in a man or feel any form of desire for that person there is no point continuing to have this person in my life. It sounds harsh I know but at 26 I have no time to wait on someone to grow on me or to hope for the person to come correct. I have done the ‘give a underdog a chance’ thing, I have been that girl transporting guys around, holding them down, I have been that girl who has got all dressed up to go on a date and been stood up. I have been that girl who has treated a guy like he is a king but haven’t received the same respect back. I HAVE BEEN THAT GIRL.

I have been through it all and even got the t-shirt. So now as an official adult who has never experienced the treatment every woman should experience; the old school chivalry, make you feel special treatment, I am not prepared to have anything less than what I deserve. The feeling of not being able to experience the qualities of what a real man should portray is disheartening and frustrating, especially when you know the type of woman you are and the qualities you will bring to a relationship. They say good things come to those wait, but I am no longer looking or waiting. Everything happens when god wants it to happen.

I am going to take this time to become a better person, work on myself and sure enough when the time is right the right one will come along….I have faith 😉

 

A heart that’s pure wont be denied, the kinda loving that will rock ya, the kinda loving that will keep ya, hold you for a lifetime.. – Teedra Moses